Since today is the Superbowl, I thought this topic was appropriate.

The other day I was working out and I was struggling to reach a workout goal I had set for myself. A brief thought flashed through my mind: “This was the hardest thing I’ve ever done” (I was really pushing myself, after all).

Then I realized something. No, what I was doing in my workout was extremely hard but it WASN’T the hardest thing I’ve ever done. I’ve faced tougher challenges in life. And, while I was working out, I remembered one particular challenge that was tougher — physically and mentally. By thinking about that other experience, I was able to redefine how challenging I thought my workout was and it helped me to realize “If I made it through a tougher challenge, I can make it through this”. Sure enough, it was the gas I needed to keep pushing.

Later, I reflected on this experience and realized how much it was like football (or any sport). It’s easy to get caught up in the moment and for that one single experience to define your reality. But the more successful people will always keep the full field in mind.

Think about your most difficult experience ever and your happiest experience ever. Make those the two goal posts in your playing field. Then, as life takes you on its complicated, circuitous, and sometimes-good-sometimes-hard journey, keep your eye on the full field.

There will be times when you experience something harder or happier than ever before — and that will redefine your field. That’s okay. Just recognize how the playing field has changed and measure everything by that new perspective.

If you want to show that special someone how much they mean to you, you need not wait until their birthday or Valentine’s Day to do it. There is nothing more romantic than giving a gift just for the sake of it. Show that you are thinking of your partner and surprise them with one of the following gifts, they are the perfect way to show your love is real.

Roses

Whether for a man or a woman, roses are a classy way to treat your lover. Roses are that much more personal and sexy than a regular bunch of flowers, so don’t just get  carnations, express your love with blood red roses. Buying and delivering the roses yourself is always great, though ordering your roses online and having them delivered is special in its own way. There is no better way to end the day than getting home to find a beautiful bunch of roses.

Make Them Dinner

Going out to restaurants is always great, though nothing can compare with a home cooked meal. Make it something elaborate though also something you can pull off, and don’t forget all the extra little touches like having candles, music, some kind of fancy drink and of course, don’t forget dessert! Your lover will feel like the luckiest person in the world to have someone go to all this effort to impress them.

Express Yourself

Write a long letter or a poem telling your lover how special they are and how much they mean to you, and post it to them. They will be surprised to get snail mail from you though they will keep your letter forever. There is nothing quite as endearing as a spontaneous expression of your love, especially one you can keep and read over and over.

Massage

Even if you don’t know how, treat your lover to a massage. Get some nice oils and help work the stress out of their weary body. You don’t need to be a masseuse to give someone a relaxing back rub, though if you really don’t think you can pull it off, pay for them to have a professional massage done. The point is to show you care by trying to help your lover de-stress and relax.

Plan A Surprise Getaway

Get your lover to agree to keep a weekend totally free, though tell them nothing of your plans. Book in at a romantic little B&B somewhere nice, arrange for reservations at a restaurant nearby, and even plan for breakfast in bed the next morning. Having flowers for him or her to start the weekend off with will also be a thoughtful touch. Research the area you’ll be staying in so you know of some options for things to do while you are there, though don’t over-plan as you want to give a chance for your partner to decide what he or she wants as well. Make it a weekend all about your partner.

The bottom line is be thoughtful and spontaneous. Showing that you listen to him or her and know what they like is a great way to impress your lover, and your surprise gift will have them more in love with you than ever.

The season of gratitude is upon us.

Thanksgiving Day is our official national holiday for giving thanks.  We traditionally celebrate it with family get-togethers and feasts of turkey, delicious side dishes and pumpkin pie.

We express our gratitude for the abundance of our lives by overindulging in the goodness of food and enjoying the company of family.

It’s a busy holiday for many people, filled with travel, cooking and socializing with family not often seen.  It’s easy to get caught up in the stress of the holiday and lose sight of the deeper meaning of the Thanksgiving tradition.

Thanksgiving has its roots in the festivals that marked the completion of the harvest season in farming communities.  Most of us no longer live in farming communities and we enjoy a far richer life than many of the farmers of old.

Our lives are more materially comfortable than at any time in history.

Even though times are tougher for many people these days, most people in the America still have plenty to eat and a warm place to sleep.  Many people have homes that are filled with expensive possessions.  Thanksgiving is definitely a day to feel grateful for our material comforts and the possessions that bring us happiness.

In addition to our possessions, there are priceless intangible things that we all possess as U.S. residents and sometimes take for granted.

These 5 things to be grateful for on Thanksgiving as Americans should be at the top of our list.

1. We Have Freedom – Our democratic government guarantees freedom of speech, freedom of religion and the right to pursue happiness as we see fit.  Our nation’s government has set an example that has caused democracy to spread throughout the world.  A few decades ago people feared the spread of communism.  That threat has disappeared as more and more nations seek the freedoms that we already enjoy.
2. We Have Choice – Freedom of choice is one of our most important rights.  We can choose where to live, what career to pursue and what type of lifestyle we want to adopt.  We have the freedom to search for the path that will take us to the realization of our dreams.  People from all over the world come to this country seeking the freedom of choice that we enjoy as a birthright.
3. We Have Tolerance – Our society continues to improve in terms of racial, religious and lifestyle tolerance.  We’ve come a long way from Marin Luther King to President Barack Obama.  There is now widespread recognition that liberty and tolerance are inseparable.  The intolerance that once brought pain to so many is fading into the past.
4. We Have Education – Free education is available to all children, providing the skills to lead a productive life.  Although the quality of schools varies by community, the right of each child in this nation to receive a basic education is protected by law and supported by our society.
5. We Have Opportunity – In many nations, a person’s position in the social order is defined at birth.  We have the opportunity to change our circumstances through education and hard work.  Talent is frequently awarded and even luck can play a part in changing the circumstances of someone’s life.  Opportunity and possibility are more available in this country than in most other places in the world.

In addition to the thankfulness we should feel as citizens of America on Thanksgiving, we can also celebrate our gratitude on a personal level.

According to studies conducted by Todd Kashdan, an associate professor of psychology at George Mason University in Virginia, gratitude is one of the most essential ingredients of a happy life.

Kashdan lists significant relationships, gratitude and the ability to live in the present moment with openness and curiosity as three elements that are essential for finding meaning and happiness in life.

By cultivating a feeling of daily gratitude, you can focus on the good things in your life and downplay the negative.  When it comes to daily gratitude, consider the most basic things that you enjoy as a human being.

In addition to the 5 things listed above to be grateful for as an American, here are 5 things to be grateful for on a daily basis.

1. You are alive. When you are grateful for the gift of life, your life will take on more meaning.  Don’t take a single day of life for granted.  Appreciate the good and bad events of each day that verify that you are alive.
2. You are healthy. Not everyone is blessed with good health.  If you have it, be grateful for it on a daily basis.  Be thankful for the ability to walk on healthy legs, to enjoy food and to take in the world through all your senses.
3. You are connected to life. When you open yourself up to the world with gratitude, you will feel connected to other people and to every living thing.  A feeling of connectedness is one of the best ways to combat loneliness.
4. You have the potential for great generosity. We live in a nation of generous people.  Seek out ways to be more generous towards friends, family and strangers.  Be generous in your expressions of gratitude to people that do things for you.  These simple expressions can lift the mood of the receiver and increase their own feelings of gratitude.
5. There is beauty in the world. Open your eyes to the beauty of the natural world around you.  Even in an urban setting, there is natural beauty to be found in the sky, in trees and plants, and in birds.  Surround yourself with reminders of the beauty of nature and take an active part in preserving the earth.

If daily gratitude is not part of your current mindset, make a resolution this Thanksgiving to make a habit of it.

Feeling daily gratitude may not come naturally and may be something you have to work at.

If you begin by forcing yourself to do it, before long it will become part of your daily thought patterns.  Instead of just being an annual holiday, Thanksgiving will become part of your lifeblood and an integral part of your own pursuit of happiness.

“I have sometimes been wildly, despairingly, acutely miserable … But through it all I still know quite certainly that just to be alive is a grand thing.”
Agatha Christie

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Quiet Your Mind. Ignite Your Soul.

Ok ok…I’m sure by now you have read about meditation in a number of places.

But is meditation really for you and WHY should you even sit down and shut up?

Let me explain…

Meditation has been used for centuries as a method for relaxation, improving health, and finding mental clarity.  With so many benefits, it’s no wonder that it is used in cultures all over the world.

It’s hard to believe that something that looks so much like sitting around doing nothing is really doing quite a lot for your mind, body, and spirit.  However, it has been found that as little as ten minutes of meditation a day can bring about significant positive changes.

Here are 45 reasons why you need to start meditating …

1. Allows for healthier flow of oxygen to the brain, which means clearer thinking and better reasoning skills.
2. Better blood flow to the muscles also helps with physical stamina so you are able to exercise more easily and for longer periods.
3. The controlled breathing of meditation translates into slower respiration and a decrease in asthma attacks and other breathing issues.
4. Deepens religious/spiritual devotion and understanding.
5. Meditation actually relaxes the nervous system, leading to a decrease in multiple stress-induced reactions.
6. It also lowers your heart rate to a healthier level.
7. The act of meditating, as well as the meditative exercises themselves, creates a more self-actualized individual.
8. Doesn’t have negative physical side effects, as do anti-anxiety medications.
9. Develops emotional maturity as one learns to be calm in the face of drama.
10. Increases the release of serotonin in the brain, a chemical that improves mood and makes one feel good naturally.
11. Helps prevent panic attacks in those who suffer from anxiety disorders.
12. Meditation can be used to improve memory and the ability to learn new things.
13. Those who meditate are able to see the big picture in order to solve complex problems.
14. The relaxing effects of meditation lead to less aggressive behavior in individuals.
15. Helps with the process required to break bad habits and addictions such as smoking, drinking, and using drugs.
16. Slows down the racing thoughts that often keep people distracted and awake at night.  In general, those who meditate find that they fall asleep easily.
17. Helps to normalize blood pressure.
18. Meditative exercises lead to a higher level of attention and empathy throughout the day.
19. Offers an opportunity to develop a deeper understanding of oneself.
20. Improves physical and mental reaction time during stressful situations.
21. Can be a solitary act that requires no outside influence, including money.
22. Allows an individual to feel a sense of connection to everything and everyone, increasing the personal capacity for love and acceptance.
23. Through meditation, one is able to develop aspects of his or her character, such as will power and inner strength.
24. Increases patience in those who practice, as they are less agitated and are even able to engage in meditation at times (like waiting in lines) when others would become annoyed.
25. Keeps mental faculties sharp and slows down the effects of age on the brain.
26. Meditators shift brain activity to less stress-prone areas of the brain, decreasing the negative effects of mild stress, depression, and anxiety.
27. Ability to release negative emotions, rather than allowing them to become one’s focus.
28. An improvement in physical posture results from holding one’s body appropriately, practicing breathing, and even from an increased sense of self confidence.
29. The physical benefits of meditation include a decrease in physical pain, especially for chronic pain sufferers.
30. Brings an opportunity to simplify one’s life, whether it means quieting some inner turmoil or recognizing the need for less material goods.
31. It is common for those who meditate to discover a significant increase in their energy levels.
32. Lessens the severity of physical and emotional symptoms of pre-menstrual syndrome and other stress factors.
33. Helps increase the overall amount lost during one’s weight-loss program due to a lowering of cortisol, as well as other factors.
34. Those who meditate regularly benefit from lower levels of heart disease.
35. Restores the body to a calm state once the flight or fight reflex has been triggered by an environmental stressor.
36. Boosts an individual’s immune system to help ward off physical ailments and diseases.
37. Increases creative output as the left and right hemispheres of the brain communicate more effectively and the mind is filled with less clutter and better able to focus in new directions.
38. Can be used in conjunction with other forms of medicine or therapy to enhance physical and mental outcomes.
39. Breathing is slowed for more efficient use of oxygen and a decreased waste of energy.
40. Improves one’s ability to “live in the present” rather than always fretting over future desires or past regrets.
41. Improves the ability to recognize one’s own thoughts and thought patterns, thereby allowing for self-reflection, acknowledgement, and even change.
42. Removes obstacles preventing individuals from succeeding, specifically by making them clear to the individual so he or she can make appropriate changes on the path to success.
43. Strengthens the digestive system for improved overall health and wellness of the body.
44. Decreases tension within the muscles of the body, resulting not only in better relaxation, but also a lower likelihood of sustaining an injury.
45. Hand-eye coordination increases within individuals who practice meditation.

“What’s encouraging about meditation is that even if we shut down, we can no longer shut down in ignorance. We see very clearly that we’re closing off. That in itself begins to illuminate the darkness of ignorance.”
- Pema Chodron-

In 2003, Dr. Jon Kabat-Zinn of the University of Massachusetts Medical School conducted a research study regarding the effects of meditation on highly-stressed employees at a high-tech company.  The resulting brain scans showed that those employees who had been taught to meditate experienced a transfer in their brain activity into the joy and happiness center in the left frontal lobe of the brain.

Studies like this one are getting more and more companies, as well as individuals, thinking about the benefits of meditation and what the practice could mean for them.  From increased productivity and job satisfaction to better relationships among employees, there are some real reasons to consider meditation in the workplace.

Of course, all of these benefits can be extended to everyday life, too, so considering meditation just for job purposes is too narrow of a focus.  Instead, think of how you could gain physically, emotionally, and spiritually by incorporating a few minutes of this deep relaxation into your daily schedule.

Thousands of years’ worth of evidence shows pretty conclusively that those who practice meditation are both happier and healthier overall.  Not bad for something that requires no money, no equipment, and only a few minutes a day.

What are you waiting for?

Learn How To Meditate: 5 Meditation Techniques That Work Like a Charm

Meditation Book Picks: Read books on meditation at TheHappySelf.com Amazon Store.

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Awaken.

Life moves, hovers, floats, bubbles, percolates inside and outside of us everyday.

At some point in our lives though, we have moments of super clarity. Call it Zen. Call it mindfulness. Call it revelation. Call it enlightenment. Call it what you will.

At this point of awakening, you realize several things in life about yourself, about life, and about the vast universe that envelopes us all. It’s like the point after a massive downpour of rain and wind, darkness and chaos, where everything becomes clear and you gaze out into a new world with baby fresh eyes.

All of a sudden, you FEEL like you have never felt.

Everything makes total sense, even if it is only for a flash.

Your body is hypersensitive to the sounds and textures around you, and all the things you have strived so hard for in life such as landing that big job, winning the lottery (even though you never play), falling in mad love with a soulmate, or even finally beating your best golf score to impress your buddies on the course all seem meaningless and pointless.

Materialism and ego cease. Soul rises. Awareness bursts out of every pore within and you simply feel…happy.

You realize that life is no perfect love story from a movie.

You realize that 90% of things don’t ever go the way you planned. So you learn to surrender. You still set goals, you just don’t rely on future expectations.

You realize the things you desired the most (with the most passion and feeling) have actually occurred because you simply gave them power in your mind and eventually, the universe created them for you.

You realize that the real perfection in life is…imperfection. Perfection is purely different perspectives of other people.

You stop being angry at others because you realize that you are just angry at yourself. And if you are the only one angry at yourself, what is the point of that? So you let it go.

You divide the difference of what you need versus what you actually want in life and discover that they are very rarely the same. Walking down the flowered path of desire and passions becomes the correct path, the path of true living. In the end, it always gives you not only what you need, but way more than you have ever wanted. It’s a surprise paradox.

You learn that FEAR really is just a four letter word. Just like the word LOVE. Both are simply feelings. Both are something we will experience in waves throughout our life. When we can simply surrender to both, life moves like a beautiful, cool, crisp mountain river.

You discover that there is your life, then there is your mental story of your life that is shaped by your past, by other people, by media, by peer pressure, and by society norms. During this moment of clarity and awakening, you decide that life as it is, without the story, is much sweeter.

You realize that work doesn’t have to suck. There is a convergence of doing something you love to do and making money at it. Thinking about it is not enough. Taking action injected with fearless passion is.

You realize you are nothing more than energy. You are the same as a rock. You are the same as a tree. In fact, those things are just blobs of energy we LABEL a “tree” and a “rock”. But underneath it all, we are all the same. Atoms. Energy. God’s fingerprints. When we can accept that and see others as ourselves, our ego dies. Our happiness rises.

You realize that there is no such thing as a mistake. You realize that there is no wrong decisions in life. If there were, you would have done something else at the time. So how can it be wrong? What is wrong is what you think would have been right…at the time. Do you think the universe and earth would have lasted billions of years if there was not some sort of cosmic and natural flow to life with all the “mistakes” that have occurred? Things are the way they are for a reason. Let it be that way.

You realize that no one is better. No one is worse. We all stand naked before the mirror at times and look the same.

You see glimpses of mortality in older people. And you even see it in child’s eyes. But at some point, you realize that there is real beauty in age, at every age. And there is beauty in death. That the soul can then transform like a butterfly and take flight in the beautiful unknown. We all will take that flight. But before we do, why not live the way we want?

There are moments that your soul will awaken if you get quiet enough. If you go silent enough. In fact, you may have had these moments during times of chaos or simply during times when the beauty of nature tapped you gently on the shoulder. Or it may have happened in a flash that occured so quickly, you missed it because you blinked. Start looking more. Stop blinking less. It is there.

The universe is knocking.

Open the door.

But first you have to quiet down the noise within to hear it.

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Feel Great...Meditate.

The practice of meditation is literally thousands of years old, with Indian scriptures discussing different methods as many as 5,000 years ago.  These practices have continued into the present day because so many people have experienced the positive effects of meditation.

We’re going to look at five different techniques today, but first, I’d like to offer an argument for WHY you should care.

The Benefits of Meditation

Above all else, meditation is a form of deep relaxation.  Whether or not a person wants to delve into the metaphysical aspects of meditation, it is impossible to ignore the fact that simply taking time out of our hectic lives for a few minutes of intense relaxation is a positive thing.  Stress is such a pervasive side effect of modern life, and giving your body and mind the time and opportunity to relax and refresh can make a huge difference in both your physical and mental well-being.

To take it a step further, many people also feel that incorporating meditation into daily life can help to overcome major obstacles, such as anger issues, depression, and even addictions.  It’s easy to see how this is possible when you realize that many of these ailments are the adverse side effects of too much stress.  By learning how to relax—and perhaps more importantly, giving ourselves permission to relax—we can help prevent many of the feelings that lead to these outcomes.

Still not convinced? Here are 100 benefits of meditation.

For Those New to Meditation

A lot of people are intimidated by the idea of meditation.  They feel that it’s too difficult or complicated.  Some may even feel a little silly about trying it out.  Really, though, meditation doesn’t have to be hard; in fact, it shouldn’t be.  If you’re worried about what other people will think, it may help to know that you can meditate just about anywhere, so you can try it out when you’re alone and see how you benefit.  You may discover that you feel more refreshed afterward, that you’re calmer, and that your heart rate and blood pressure have lowered to a healthier level.

Meditation Technique #1:  Om

When you picture meditation, you may have an image of someone sitting cross-legged on the floor uttering the sound “ohh-mmm.”  This is not so far from the truth, actually.  That “ohh-mmm” sound is the syllable “om,” and in some cultures, it has very special significance.  While sitting or lying quietly, repeat the mantra “om” to yourself over and over.  You can choose to do this aloud or silently.  The most important aspect is that you allow yourself to relax fully as you repeat the syllable.  As you do so, your breathing should deepen, which increases blood flow to your brain and stimulates thinking and awareness.

Meditation Technique #2:  Concentrating on a Flame

As I mentioned, some people are intimidated by meditation, and the idea of chanting “om” might be throwing you off a little.  Instead of letting go of the idea of meditation altogether, why not find a technique that works for you?  One such idea is to sit in a dim room with a lit candle about four feet in front of you at eye level.  Focus on the flame and allow your mind to become still.  You may find that at first your mind actually becomes more active, but if you allow these thoughts to run in and out of your head, you will soon find that things are becoming quiet as you simply stare at the flickering light.

Really observe the flame, top to bottom, concentrating on the heat and the light that it gives.  You will likely become highly aware of its movement and glow.  Imagine that there is a similar flame inside every person, creature, and inanimate object and feel its energy as it courses through you.  It also helps us to recognize how we are all connected.

Meditation Technique #3:  Movie Review

When you lay down at night, do you often find little pieces of your day flitting in and out of your mind, keeping you from falling asleep?  This technique can not only help you put those thoughts (and your body) to rest, but it can even help to improve your memory.  Upon laying down at night, close your eyes, and do a mental review of your day by watching it as if it were on a movie screen and you were the only audience member.  Start with the very first memory you have of the day, perhaps of opening your eyes and turning off your alarm.  Next you probably got out of bed and walked out of your room.  Visualize everything you can remember from your day, but also take the opportunity to feel the feelings that accompanied each activity.  Were you excited about something that happened today?  Worried?  Recognize and acknowledge those feelings.

At first, you will likely find that you don’t remember all that many details from your day, but as you continue to practice this technique, you will remember more and more.  In fact, you will likely become more observant during the day as a result.  Not only that, but after watching your day on that mental movie screen, you have given your mind the chance to quiet and prepare itself for sleep.

Meditation Technique #4:  Take in the Positive and Release the Negative

This technique allows you to let go of many of the negative emotions that may be holding you back or keeping you from being as happy as you would like to be.  Begin by sitting or lying in a comfortable position.  Breathe in deeply, so that your diaphragm expands with each inhalation.  It may help to put your hand on your stomach the first couple of times so that you can feel your diaphragm rise and fall.  Once you have relaxed in this way for a couple of minutes, start to give names to your breath as you inhale and exhale.

For example, when you breathe out, tell yourself that you are exhaling selfishness.  The replace it with something positive, such as compassion, as you inhale.  Next you may want to exhale sadness and inhale peace; exhale ego and inhale humility; or exhale nervousness and inhale confidence.  Take your time and focus on those things you want to eliminate and those things you want to accept.

Meditation Technique #5:  Prayer

Prayer and meditation have much in common.  In some cases, the two are actually one and the same.  In order to consciously use the practice of prayer in meditation, try this technique.  Sit or lie quietly in a place where you can relax and be alone.  Say prayers in the normal fashion, but make a point to mentally observe yourself as you do so.  In this way, you become almost a “witness” to your own praying.  You may find that you become a little judgmental of yourself as you pray for things that seem selfish.  Acknowledge this feeling and let it go, continuing to observe yourself as you pray.   Make a point to pray for others.  Choose specific people or groups to pray for.  Then allow yourself to offer a prayer for everyone and everything in the world.

As you see yourself praying, you will likely feel the positive emotions that are created within you as you ask for blessings, healing, and understanding.  You will likely find that the more selfless your prayer is, the more positively you are affected by it, too.  This encourages you to continue to become less focused on self and more compassionate and, in the end, more fulfilled.

Conclusion

Meditation can be a powerful tool for changing your outlook, as well as for improving your health, creating more energy, and simply feeling better.  The techniques outlined here are not at all difficult, but they can be life-altering if used in a positive manner.  By giving yourself as little as 10-20 minutes a day to meditate, you can experience benefits that go along with reducing stress and taking a few moments for yourself.

“If you want to find God, hang out in
the space between your thoughts.”
-Alan Cohen-

Recommended reading:

Mindfulness in Plain English by Bhante Henepola Gunaratana

This is a great beginners guide on how to inject mindfulness into your daily life. It is one of the most simplified books on the subject, but at the same time, very informational. If you are new to meditation and mindfulness, this one is a must read. Want to read this great book online? You can read it here.

Read more about it at Amazon.com.

8 Minute Meditation by Victor Davich

Do you think you don’t have enough time in your day to meditate? Now it only takes you 8 simple  minutes. In this amazing book, author Victor Davich will show you how to implement a simple yet powerful 8 minute meditation into your daily life for profound changes.

Read more about it at Amazon.com

]]> http://www.thehappyself.com/meditation-techniques//feed 21 http://www.thehappyself.com/the-magic-of-doing-things-slowly/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=the-magic-of-doing-things-slowly http://www.thehappyself.com/the-magic-of-doing-things-slowly/#comments Tue, 11 Aug 2009 21:33:26 +0000 admin http://www.thehappyself.com/?p=1690

Life moves fast and so does our minds, our bodies, and everything around us. New products are created to make life more simple and “fast acting”. TV programs show us how to get that killer body or create that perfect room in our house in just under a few hours or days.

It is a fast paced world we live in. The days of no TV, no video games, no computers, etc. are long behind us. Life buzzes around us at an astonishing pace and we try to jam pack everything we can into our days and lives.

But the question we have to ask is…

Where does moving through life so fast actually get us?

Is there a special place in life we are trying to get to? If so, what happens if we do get there?

Many of us believe that if we DO reach that point or ultimate goal, things will finally be calm and happy in our lives. We think that life will be pretty much perfect at that point. But will it? The reality is…it won’t. The truth of the matter is there will always be more things to acquire, more “stuff” to get done, …

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Go Slow. Savor Life.

Life moves fast and so does our minds, our bodies, and everything around us. New products are created to make life more simple and “fast acting”. TV programs show us how to get that killer body or create that perfect room in our house in just under a few hours or days.

It is a fast paced world we live in. The days of no TV, no video games, no computers, etc. are long behind us. Life buzzes around us at an astonishing pace and we try to jam pack everything we can into our days and lives.

But the question we have to ask is…

Where does moving through life so fast actually get us?

Is there a special place in life we are trying to get to? If so, what happens if we do get there?

Many of us believe that if we DO reach that point or ultimate goal, things will finally be calm and happy in our lives. We think that life will be pretty much perfect at that point. But will it? The reality is…it won’t. The truth of the matter is there will always be more things to acquire, more “stuff” to get done, more goals to achieve, more obstacles to overcome, etc. There is no end.

So all of this got me to thinking about life. It made me realize, that being mindful and being fully present are the keys to unlocking happiness. But not only that, in many things we do…if we SLOW things down, we can enjoy them much much more and life will become so much more meaningful. Life will explode with more beauty and magic, if we just let it.

Life will simply become much more alive to us if we do many things much more slowly.  A certain kind of magic will be revealed from doing things slowly and mixing that with pure awareness and mindfulness.

What we simply need to do is release this magic in our everyday life. We need to slow down, be aware, and pay attention to what is in front of us. So how do we do this? It really is pretty simple. First, we become fully present in whatever we are doing. Doing this will bring to life…our life. Secondly, we need to slow things down a bit and not rush through things. When we slow things down, we become more mindful, naturally, and this leads to increased awareness. When we do both, mindfulness and slowing things down, the magic of living truly reveals itself around us.

Here are a few things you can do slowly to unlock this special magic in everyday life…

• Eating
  Food. We all love it and we all need it. But many of us simply throw down what is in front of us like a ravaging carnivore. We don’t eat, we inhale! What if you slowed things down a bit and actually FULLY tasted your food? I know, crazy, huh? Give this a try next time you are having lunch. Turn off the TV, and eat slowly. Become aware of the sensations in your mouth…it may surprise you. Buy a chocolate bar or a pint of ice cream, for starters, and find out how amazing it can be when you fully taste it, feel the texture in your mouth, etc.

• Deep Breathing
  Just like food, breathing is just as essential to our ability to live. But many of us simply take breathing for granted, and when we become stressed and tense, we don’t breathe enough or we do it very rapidly. What we need to do is make a point to fully breathe…and do it slowly. Breathing slow does all kinds of wonderful things to us. It calms the nervous system, it releases stress, and it also makes us become mindful of being fully alive. I think many of us have forgotten how that feels.

• Lifting Weights
  If you are into lifting weights, you are probably like most…you lift weights as fast as you can. You hurry through repetitions and move on to the next exercise. But watch what happens when you do your repetitions slowly, and with proper form. Not only will you feel the weight MUCH more, your body will resist it more thus creating more tone and strength. It works. Try it.

• Building a Business That Lasts
  “Rome wasn’t built in a day” is a quote you probably have heard and it is true. So why try to build a business in a hurry? The trick is to do it slow and steady, and most of all, do it correctly with proper planning and guidance. If you do it quickly, it will most likely fail. Create a strong foundation, and you will create something that will most likely last while your competitors fail. Don’t forget about creating personal relationships with your customers too, it will pay dividends down the road.

• Cooking
  Sure, some things are best when cooked quickly, like a huge bowl of stir fried veggies or scrambled eggs…but there are many types of foods that are best when cooked slowly. Crock pot cooking is a good example of this, and so is down home, finger lickin’ slow cooked BBQ ribs. The real magic is the taste and smell one can enjoy when it is all said and done. Chili and a hearty stew are also fine examples.

• Investing
  So you think that you have to be a whiz kid on Wall Street to make a killing in the market? Or you may even think you have to invest a lot of money, at the right time, and quickly to make huge gains. I can tell you, the majority of winners in the stock market take it slow and steady and rely on the magic of compound interest. You can still retire rich, and you don’t have to be an expert…you just have to start and put your money in slowly over time the right way.

• Having a Real Conversation
  I bet there has been a few times when you talked with a friend or loved one for hours on end, with no agenda and no time frame. Remember how amazing it felt to connect? Now with things such as cell phones and texting, we have lost the simple art of slow and personal conversations. Why not strike up a conversation and truly be present with that person and see where it goes, without any time limit? Watch the magic unfold.

• Drinking a Hot Beverage
  In the heart of winter I think sitting down, in complete silence and having a warm cup of coffee or tea can not be beat. There is real comfort and peace that comes from it. But of course, it can not be rushed because for one, you will burn your mouth…and two, you will simply lose the full magic of the moment to become aware and reconnect with your senses as the warm fluid invigorates your body.

• Reading a Great Book
  Now I’m not a fiction reader, but I do know that I love a great book. I find the best way to fully enjoy a book is to read it slowly, just a little each day, savoring each word or bit of information that is being passed on to my curious mind. For me, reading before bed can be a great pleasure and nothing but pure joy. Check out a book on something you would enjoy, and give yourself a good month or two to go through it slowly. Watch how much of it you will absorb.

• Giving a Simple Massage
  Next time your mate or spouse is having a rough day, give them a slow and deep massage. You don’t even have to break out massage oils or anything. Simply rub there shoulders, but do it slowly with deep squeezes. Watch how they will melt in your hands, and in turn, treat you with greater respect and love. In many cases, you will probably get one in return!

• Push Ups and Abdominal “Crunches”
  Don’t have time to hit the gym or just too lazy to get in your car and go? Why not try doing push ups everyday. I find it the perfect exercise for strength, and it is dead simple to do. But the key is to do it sloooow. Really take your time in doing push ups and you will tone up and tighten up in no time. If you feel really adventurous, why not take the 100 PushUp Challenge.  The very same method can be done for tightening and toning your abs with crunches. Just do them slowly as well, and results will quickly follow.

• Meditation
  Something that I need to do more and I HIGHLY recommend for others to do is meditate daily. It’s amazing the type of happiness and contentment that can arise within us when we slow down, take a time out from life, and simply sit…peacefully. No need to rush the process. No need to rush or expect enlightenment to happen. The goal is to do, nothing. And nothing is good. Here are 100 reasons why you should start.

• Romance
  There are so many elements of romance that are best when taken slowly. It can start from day one when you are first courting a possible mate (don’t go too fast, or they will flee), to kissing, all the way to making love. Doing all these things slowly will turn romance from a few light sparks into a full out light show.

• Creating Art or Writing
  I believe the best art and the best writing is created when it is taken slowly and well developed. The more depth it has, the more interesting it can be. Now I know this may not be the case for others, but for me, when I read or see something in art that is has something new “pop out” each time I look at it…I find that magical. Why not create something and really put your heart and soul into it. Even if it takes 5 years to create, just imagine how powerful it will be when it is completed!

• Talking to God
  I know this one is a personal preference, but I find that talking to God like he is my best friend is the best. Conversations can be about ANYTHING and for any length of time. God has no stopwatch or time limit…God IS time. He has all day, and all eternity. Talk to him, and discover yourself through him.

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As you can see, there are many things in life one can do slowly to unveil the real magic underneath it. The KEY is mindfulness and being fully aware.

Get out of your head and into your experience.

What do you do slowly that YOU enjoy?

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